Twelve Annoying Things (My) Kids Do
- Walk one centimeter behind me.
- Use markers in a manner which is potentially harmful to the walls and furniture.
- Fake cry. They think it’s hilarious.
- “Help” by “refolding” the laundry. I let this one go because I feel like one day it will turn into actual helping by actually folding the laundry, but I can barely breathe I’m so stressed out while the unfolding/bad refolding is going on in its current incarnation.
- If everything is going well, someone seems to hurt themselves in a random, self-inflicted way (e.g., whipping around a rope, which then whips the whipper in the eye), which leads to the need for five minutes of patting and soothing.
- Climb into my lap while I am trying to type.
- While I am cleaning up one room, they are making a mess in another room.
- Wake me up in the middle of the night to tell me they just peed in the toilet.
- Ask me, at 6:55 a.m., “What’s for dinner tonight?”
- If I am thinking adult thoughts for the first time all day, all four will suddenly want me to make them food.
- Make a mess, and then when I ask them to clean it up, say, “It wasn’t only me! They helped too! It’s not fair! I’m not gonna clean it up all by myself!” and then sit down and read a book.
- Say “Help me with this! I need help!” and then as I stop what I’m doing and am 6 inches from them, say, “Oh! I got it! Never mind.”
And still, I love them, and think they are super cute and fun and funny.